"Do you love me?"

"Do you truly love me?"

The strange thing about Jesus asking Peter if he loved Him is that didn't Peter just jump out of a boat and swim to shore to meet him? John 21:4-17 Wasn't that passion? Wasn't that love? Or, at least wasn't it an action that proved that Jesus was very special to him?



But here, sitting around a cozy campfire, munching on fish with Jesus, Thomas, Nathaniel, the sons of Zebedee, and two other disciples, just like old times; now Peter was being tested. Always so quick with an answer in the past, a broken Peter searches a shame filled heart and thinks, "Yes, Jesus, I like you a lot. I even love you but I sure wasn't there for you when you really needed me. And you know everything, you know that I love you but I don't know really what it means to love you totally yet."

I picture Peter digging deeply for some passion - some "feel good feelings" that would confirm his love for Jesus. Doesn't that happen to us from time to time on this journey? Even while we, as disciples and ministers, feed God's sheep and reach out to the sick and the poor, even then don't we sometimes wonder; do I REALLY love Jesus?

Is there always a passionate, emotional, gushy response to Jesus' question to any of us? "Marie, do you love me"? At times I struggle with trying to answer this question with the depth I feel the Lord deserves. I pray often for the Holy Spirit to give me holy passion for Jesus. And sometimes I feel down right guilty for not "feeling" hot, fiery love for Jesus all the time. But, I have talked to others and know that many of you also are faced with this ambiguity of emotions.

Jesus knew Peter was really trying to impress Him with his professions of love, but he couldn't quite get it up to the level to which he knew Jesus was asking. However, even while Peter was groping, Jesus was commissioning him! "Feed My lambs, tend to My sheep, feed My sheep." The fisherman was being called to become a shepherd! We all know the rest of the story. Peter was known for his effectiveness in caring for the early church: the lambs. They were all lambs at first. His life was on the line constantly because of his willingness to obey the Master.

In one of His final instructions to His disciples Jesus said, "If anyone loves me, he will obey my teaching". John 14:23a Ah, there is the answer to the question of passion. When we obey the Lord; follow Him where He leads and do what He is revealing to us by the Spirit - then we are for sure demonstrating our love for Him. There is not always a lot of gushy-feel-good-mushy love being expressed for Jesus when we obey. Saying "I love you, Jesus" a thousand times is nice. But, I wonder how our acts of obediance bless Jesus even more.

The next time you wonder if Jesus really knows you love Him and are wildly crazy about Him just think about the last time that you, by faith, obeyed His Word, or the leading of His Spirit. Obediance;That's LOUD and PASSIONATE love! It really is!